For if one cannot sleep, better to just blog about it.
It must have been the tea. Or perhaps this cough that would not go away. Nonetheless, this sleeplessness has caused me to ponder over things as I lie in my bed. My eyes were closed but my mind remained very much awake.
In a little less than a month, all my requirements as a senior will be over. In a little less than two months, I will be graduating and my life as a college student will be over. And I pray that all goes well so that eventually happens.
Something is wrong with me though. My entire being works ever so slowly as if it thinks that doing so would lengthen the time before everything ends. When I think about it, it’s not laziness because I am quite all right with doing the school work. So then I asked my friend what it could possibly be.
SENIORITIS. Yes, that feeling.
I’m not sure what the exact description of this sickness is so I can only offer my perspective of it, all based from experience It is that feeling that makes you not want things to end – just yet. It is the feeling that makes you look back on all your past photos and make you realize how much you have changed from freshman year up to the present. It is the feeling that makes you want to freeze time and get stuck in the moment. And by moment, each and every moment that is just so freaking awesome. Because it is the feeling that makes you treasure each experience even more than before. It makes you ponder on the things you have done and the things you haven’t and makes you wonder why you still have not done those things which you have not. Or could not – perhaps because of some hindrances, be it you yourself or other external factors. So it is that feeling that makes you want to do those things because you don’t want to miss out on anything. It is the feeling that makes you want to carpe diem, to “do one thing that scares you everyday,”, and to follow every single adage that screams FEARLESS between its lines. It is that feeling.
It is the feeling of perhaps every senior out there right now who is awake right now and will be awake till wee hours of the morning for the weeks to come, just so we could finish each and every requirement we have for school.
It is the feeling that keeps you awake, gets you thinking over the what-ifs, and makes you want to jump. No holds barred.
So yes, I think I have it. Oh that feeling.